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theIDIOT 
muhd syaMIM bin norman. legally 18 29sep1990 the undercover liar Friendster Facebook Myspace Flickr
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date: Jul 28, 2008
title: Home.
time: 10:08 AM
I am sorry, Syamim. I really am so sorry. I keep getting stuck in various situations, I don't wish to get you sucked into them. I don't want to hurt you anymore, please bear that in mind. It's better this way, because the sooner we end it, the less it'll hurt. Rather than to drag it longer. Look what I've done. I've already hurt you twice, I don't want to hurt you again. Everything is in a mess, I'm all confused. Please understand that. I'm sorry. I hope you're ok. You have never brought any burden to me, neither were you the catalyst to my problems. Nothing. It was never anything about what you did or how you feel, believe me. It hasn't got anything to do with you. It's smiles you brought, that's what you did. You're strong, you'll get through this. You'll find some other girl who is much much better than me. Someone who will never ever break your heart, lie or cause any problems to you. I'm not that girl, I'm not even close to it. All I ever brought you was heartbreaks over and over again, and you deserve better. I'm sorry. I really am sorry. It is for the best. I'll miss you. Take care. p/s: this song will always be dedicated to you. date:
title: movies, dancing and broken hearts.
time: 8:45 AM
first of all, before i rant about my weekends, let me just say.. CONGRATULATIONS SYAMIM! why you may ask. this post is my 100th post. wow, 100 posts i have all so far. damn, thats a lot i can say. more to come i guess. weekends weekends weekends, were absolutely great. lets start with friday shall we.  PHAT NITE BABEY!! it was hell of a time at phat nite. thank god i had a partner-in-crime. if it wasnt for him, i dont think my nite will be that great. lets just say dirty dancing was involved, with a few girls with only us two guys. okay, whatever happens there happens there. enough of phat nite. next year shall we. on saturday, i went to catch batman the dark knight with my partner-in-crime. it was a great show. with twists and turns, and with joker in the show, a sufficient dose of laughter was thrown in the movie. i can really say heath ledger deserve that award. he potray joker fucking damn well. too bad he wont be back for the sequel.  sunday went to catch another movie with partner-in-crime and his own partner. three is a crowd so what. we enjoyed the movie, which was about strangers getting married and not knowing the consenquences. overall, nice movie and hilarious too. oh, thanks yati for the company during dinner. if not i would really felt stupid eating dinner with those two lovebirds. it sucked to know your friends are in love and you are still finding. to that girl, i guess you are right. i am not meantn to have feelings for you. since you put it that way, i will forget about you. guess sometimes friends are better than getting into a relationship. i am sorry. i am hungry, very hungry. and i left three cigarettes left. hope i can survive. how come this 100th post doesnt feel all so happy and enjoyable. no mood to blog i guess. got to move on, AGAIN. getting bored of this feeling. anyway, go watch the dark knight. its a must if you havent catch it yet. got to go now. till next time. damn. cheers. date: Jul 25, 2008
title: phatty phat nitey nite.
time: 3:22 PM
im in class right now and having test but im still on blogger, blogging. dreamweaver rules! i think. i just cant wait to get this test over and done with. because PHAT NITE is going on tonight! woohoo! cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait cant wait!!!!!!excited huh. hope it wont bore me to death. the event is held in a small room. as long as i can party then its fine by me. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! cheers. date: Jul 20, 2008
title: i've got to find a way to keep myself from thinking of you.
time: 2:08 PM
i got molested during body surfing. though you are bound to be touched all over during body surfing. and hell, it was a helluva great time yesterday night during plainsunset's gig at youth park. came late, and missed out on caracal and west grand boulevard. damn, caracal, the band that i always wanted to listen badly, and i came late. anyway, watched the gig with my secondary schoolmates. when plainsunset was coming up next, my friend pulled me into the middle and eventually to the front of the mosh pit. and it was fucking fun when plainsunset came in, minus the slippery floor caused by the rain. i tried body surfing, and the first try was a fluke. stupid shit i can say. you know its like fucked up when you go up the stage and see dozens of people staring at you, waiting for you to jump. and my first try failed, badly. second time was the best. i just went up and straight away dived into the crowd. sorry for the kicks to the head people, thats body surfing. great time great time.that is finally off my, umm, fingers. still aint off my chest until i speak to him. another thing off my chest was something that i wanted to tell her in hints but apparently she lost the conversation. sorry if you now feel differently. too sudden for you most probably. but please, like i promise you before, promise me now that after this, do not stop talking to me or be angry at me alright. i kept that promise of mine, and please i hope you will promise me that too. stay happy-go-lucky always sweets. no matter what lies were said, you are always on my mind. projects and more projects. i am so dead. what more my groupmate is having personal problems, hope she settles it fast. not that i blame her, i feel bad as i felt i was part of that problem. sorry babe. take care aites. smile more okay. deadlines deadliney dead. oh people. do not forget to leave a tag about what hairstyle i should keep. bald is certainly out of the context people. no way i am going bald. suggestions please. and if anybody has a job opening, please oh please tell me. my wallet has webs and bats inside. need cash desperately. no selling of body please. that is all i guess. certain issues have to be settled fast. if not, things can get out of hand. an advice for everyone, trust you own flesh and blood and not your sources. and if you want to tell a lie, please do it professionally. ask me, the best lying bastard you can ever meet. cheers. date: Jul 18, 2008
title: bad hair day.
time: 5:10 PM
as the title says, i am having a bad hair day. nowadays i have to wear a headband when my hair totally irritates me. but i aint going to cut my hair. i wanna keep it long and experiment with long hair. should i have dreadlocks? maybe an afro? or a fucking long mohawk? i just emo hairstyle, which is quite boring. of maybe frizzy? curls? i do not know. so people, this is my shout out to you. in my tagboard, type your suggestions. just type "syamim should get a/an....", followed by the type of hairstyle. help me people, to choose the type of hairstyle please. this is an emergency, i think. cheers. date: Jul 17, 2008
title: what the fuck have you done today..
time: 1:45 AM
excuse the vulgarity in my title. it was just the last sentence that was said in the last part of a great movie, WANTED! i can only say it was a terrific movie. comparing this movie to shooter, wanted has more realism in it, though i am still wondering how do you curve a bullet when shot. great storyline, with a lot of twists from the start. oh, i watched it with ky(no one else wanted to join) and it was only six bucks for the tickets, though i only paid four cause ky paid two for me. freeloader huh. anyway, go catch the movie. you wont regret it.news and more news just keep pouring in. got to know some people are fucking with someone, who is close to me, and her relationship. please, for god sake, aren't you both being disliked by many. please do not spoil people's happiness. and to her guy, please put your priorities right. where does your true love really lies dude. take care girl. and to you, yeah you. forgiven long ago alright. just chill about your own matters with some people, the same people causing disruption with my friend and her boyfriend. wow, they really have caused so much shit huh. and now you have fallen asleep without any warning. sheesh.! the flame has been reignited. that is all, for now. i am busy with assignments, projects, people, myself and band auditions. message me and i will make an effort to reply. unlike some people. just kidding. cheers. date: Jul 15, 2008
title: the inflated balloon just POP.
time: 3:08 PM
"Everything’s so blurry. And everyone's so fake. And everybody’s empty. And everything is so messed up. Pre-occupied without you. I cannot live at all. My whole world surrounds you. I stumble then I crawl. You could be my someone. You could be my scene. You know that I’ll protect you. From all of the obscene. I wonder what you're doing. Imagine where you are. There’s oceans in between us. But that’s not very far. Can you take it all away? Can you take it all away? When you shoved it in my face? This pain you gave to me. Can you take it all away?Can you take it all away? When ya shoved it in my face? Oh, Nobody told me what you thought. Nobody told me what to say. Everyone showed you where to turn. Told you where to run away. Nobody told you where to hide. Nobody told you what to say. Everyone showed you where to turn. Showed you where to run away." part of the lyrics of the song blurry by puddle of mudd. the lyrics just explains what i felt yesterday night. she told me the real story and it just sucked. i was brought down by a lie that was said to just made someone go away. i was heartbroken for nothing. my hopes were dashed just like that. it just sucked and sucked more and more. can i just ask why, oh why this things happen. i gave up because of that. he should have just kept his mouth shut. or i should have just ask her instead of her friends. why do these things happen. should i or not carry on. damn. date: Jul 14, 2008
title: empty.
time: 2:19 AM
one day... date: Jul 8, 2008
title: some will seek forgiveness, others escape...
time: 1:58 AM
everything went downhill. i was falling so fast i just did not have time to bring any life supports. with nothing to cling on to, i just felt helplessly falling. neither hope nor faith could save me now. not even the thing call love. and certainly not lust. i thought that every ups, there are its downs. and vice versa. but the downs that i had for the past few weeks are from getting better. the light at the end the tunnel seem so far away. and it gets farther away every single day. a huge decision i have to make by the end of today. what will my choice be. i need someone to guide me. dear god, please help. and for those whose lives have been affected by me. i apologize, from the bottom of my heart. to those having relationships, treasure them always. sorry if i had came in the way. sometimes i really do wonder. when will it all end... date: Jul 5, 2008
title: random nak mampos.
time: 2:07 AM
What happens when you drop a piece of mentos into a bottle of Coca cola?Green, It's hard to believe what happened has happened and there was so minimum that either one of us could do to stop things from happening or make it better that what it turned out to be. Even though it all seems to be ok (or maybe it is, I don't know), I still feel bad. The whole time while watching the competition, my mind kept wondering. Had I said or done something which led you on, was there something about me that attracted you to me. Or was it because I was so weird, and had weird habits. I never expected you to have feelings for me, and I didn't know or suspect anything, I swear. That is why I didn't mention anything about my relationship. You've always been a great companion to me. Sometimes when they point it out to me that you were somewhat hinting or that it was obvious, I refused to believe it. Because since the first day we were friends, you have always been a good friend to me, and I'll always see you as that. She didn't really tell me what you told her the other time, so when you said you did, it came to be a really big shock to me, that I didn't know what to say to you. I didn't reply that text message, it wasn't me, I swear. I'm sorry if have hurt you or anything, judging from your reply. I know I've already said it, but I still feel guilty about it all. You have to believe me when I say I never meant to hurt you, really. I never had any intentions of doing so, because good friends don't plan horrible plans to bring them down or demoralise them. I always saw your good points in almost everything, even though at times I tease you about being a flirt and all. At times I may be a little straightforward to you, but I've always believed the positivity about you, and nothing else, I promise. And about that stare, I know I shouldn't bring it up but just to make it clear -- I have never lied to you about the things that I see. I may have reacted irrationally, partly because I was so irritated as to why somebody who doesn't know me at all could give me that look, and invite more to do the same. I wasn't the only one who saw it, my friend was with me too. It depends if you want to believe me, but I swear, I am telling the truth. I don't want to fall out of a great friendship like this, because it's been wonderful having a friend like you around. Thank you for all your surprise treats and always being concern for my health and everything else. You'll always be a good friend to me, and I treasure our friendship ever so dearly, I don't ever want it to end. Things don't have to change. Just so you know, I still keep that paper rose you left in my paperbag, and the name you wired during your lesson. :) I'm really sorry. I feel terrible. Hope you'll forgive me. Yours sincerely, Orangeville. IT EXPLODES! WOOOOHOOOOO! date: Jul 4, 2008
title: fourth strike...
time: 2:04 AM
the umpire shouted "YOU'RE OUT!!" for the third time when i was about to reach the home base. but i kept on running, having another go. though i have had three strikes, my hopes were high up hoping that i could reach the home base in time this turn. i started my fourth run around the field. but this fourth run came up short, even before i reach the first base. the coach shouted "THAT'S NUMBER FOUR!! GET OFF THE FIELD!!". my soul has been beaten down hard, again and again and again. can i pick myself up again, one more time, and have another go. but if i do, will i end up short again and have another strike added into these four strikes i have been accumulating for six months. on my knees, i look up to my opponents. they have smiles on their faces, and suddenly i smiled too. because they are happy, and that is what i wanted more than anything else. for them to be happy makes me certain they are not hurt or demoralized. hope those smiles stay on their faces till the end. i stood up and started walking towards the bench. a slow walk with the thoughts and memories rushing in of those four unsuccessful runs. suddenly, the coach, who is like the heart in me, tells me to turn around and walk back to home base. so i find myself walking back to home base, with a new fresh start and a little more positive thinking. all that is going through my mind are hope and faith. i am standing over the home base right now, looking at the pitcher, once again. Waiting...... lets have another go, shall we... date: Jul 2, 2008
title: misery loves its company.
time: 1:23 PM
tuesday, july 1st was certainly a fucked up day. all things went wrong since afternoon onwards. why didnt i say from morning onwards, cause i had a good time in the morning. just started to went downhill from lunchtime onwards.caught the movie Get Smart in the morning with the Invincible Catwoman. the show was good, typical comedy spy storyline. there were good laughs in the movie, but sometimes the show could be quite stale. at least i got to enjoyed it with that Catwoman. quite WEIRD watching movie in the theatre which was 3/4 empty. after movie went off to school, bla bla bla. shit happened in the afternoon. lets just say i hope not to bump into those three letters again, what fucking Hippies Super Awesome. at night was worse. general meeting again. i got to be orang kampung. me in orang-orang kampung clothing again, just like last year's production. to that boy, you said your stories but i do not give a fuck. u laid your hand on me when i didnt even touch a single strain of hair on you. you just picked the wrong time to find trouble with me. i am sorry to everybody else who witness what happened. yes, especially for the freshies, that is my real side. the one that i have been keeping inside and not letting out. sometimes being nice and humble just wont do for me. oh wells, full speed ahead for productions i guess. i need to find my crew members. "i've got to find a way to stop you falling into my mind..." but why would i want that. maybe now i am more afraid after all that has happened in the past. there goes the neighbourhood. cheers. |
